My mind flits around like crazy and I often find it hard to concentrate. It is 500 times worse when I am very tired. I can't stand it because I want to enjoy what I am doing, but I can't. I want day to go by, for my obligation to be over so I won't have to keep trying to concentrate (which is failing anyway).

I walk by the waterfall, but I can't enjoy it. I want to be at the top of the hill. I'm at the top of the hill, it's a nice view, but I want to be at the bottom, done walking down. I'm in class, I want to be at home. I'm at home, I'm bored. It never ends. It makes me insane. I understand what Eckhart Tolle said, I can't live with myself anymore... who is this "self" I can't live with?

I am so tired of wishing away my life, so I force myself to just sit there and concentrate for a little bit each day. I would like to think it doesn't matter much, and so I don't have to do it, but I know that's not true for me. All the eight limbs of yoga will work for me in the long run... I would like to be able to be just a little more still, so I stop missing the moments.